College Homework

Lol, there is more to come, for example.....






Look people, face it. Apart from hostel issues...Lecturers are pretty tough on you. They like to give you that piranha like smile, then gobble you up in a mere second. And you will find yourself screaming for your freaking life as you travel down the lecturers oesophagus. All of a sudden, you find yourself shrinking...and shrinking...and see a bubbling green liquid approaching as you land in the stomach. After that, you will find a small boat made from an undigested cheese and pay the boatman to bring you to the excretory system so you could finally emerge back into the world thru erm...where poop comes from and remain a munchkin the size of Thumbelina for the rest of your life. Alright, I am  exaggerating. Or maybe its just the coffee I am drinking...hmmm....I wonder...if you drink green tea latte, will your stomach juice become green. Oh, to hell with it. 

The main point here is that lecturers give a lot of assignments. Har??? You only get the point now? Wow, you are pretty slow. My metaphor of inter-galaxic travel, erm I mean inter-body travel perfectly mirrors the suffering of assignments. *solemn nod* Just like twenty minutes ago, I was pouring over my assignment, and well, making soup, and watching Burlesque..just a bit as I did my essay... (Hey, I just enjoy watching guys with eyeliners, gives me a hell of a good laugh!) Okay, maybe I wasn't that focused on my law essay...=.= Only when the sky started turning dark that I remembered the deadline IS tomorrow. 

So, I am going to discuss here various types of college students and the ways they complete their assignments.

Biology Jock- Oh my god, I had been studying cells and organisms since like what, I was 10 or something, and here I am still doing this shit. Argh, screw homework, I am going to go find some girls and learn about their biological erm...features instead. If you know what I mean...*wink wink

Biology Geek-Reproductive system? Blush....*make weird human anatomy models...

Law Student-Play...play...play...what homework??

Business Studies Student- I will do your homework for 50 bucks. 45 bucks? Are you out of your freaking mind??????!!!!! DO YOU KNOW HOW FREAKING TIRED IT IS TO COPY AND PASTE FROM WIKIPEDIA FOR YOU???????? !$%$#U&*&(&^*#$%!@#%$$^&^(%$%#$^#@

Psychology Student- *hypnotise lecturer...YOU WILL NEVER GIVE UP ANYMORE ASSIGNMENTS...YOU WILL NEVER GIVE US MORE ASSIGNMENTS......You will let us read Playboy in class....  (Lecturer: I will follow whatever you say....I will....YOUR FREAKING ASS! I HAD BEEN A PSYCHOLOGY LECTURER FOR 30 YEARS AND I HAVE A PHD YOU LITTLE NINCOMPOOP!!!!!! And YOU are trying to hypnotize me????!!!! )

Mathematics Students- *retreating in a corner...

Petroleum Engineering Students- WAHH!!! LETS GO BE ORANG MINYAK!!!!

Language Students- Pray hand me that delectable parasol, dear gentleman? It is pouring teacups and saucers. I am in much fear that it would ruin my genteel porcelain-like skin...

Culinary Art Students- Ask me to bake a cake???!!!! Aiya, easy only. Just go and get in those bakery thingi and just get one lar...

So.........

Guess what kind of student I am???? If you do...then...for people that knows me, THAT IS CHEATING!!!!!!!!!!!

Ciao~
~Twitchy Nichii

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